


Election

by Ihere



Series: PoliceForcestuck [17]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Chaos, Corruption, Elections, F/F, F/M, Gen, Other, mafia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-25
Updated: 2013-02-28
Packaged: 2017-11-22 10:06:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/608640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ihere/pseuds/Ihere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An election for Skaia's mayor has come around again. However, the people running for the office will lead a frightening future for the city. Who can run for mayor and save Skaia from turmoil?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

A troll officer walks into the police department’s main entrance; the receptionist greets him. “Good morning Mr. Vantas. Should I make note that you have returned from your assignment, or do you plan to depart soon?”

“Gah!” He spontaneously cries out. “I just want to go back to bed! Not arrest some two-bit sex offender who was probably drunk because who else would try to show the most worthless part of their body that has no chance of reproducing, to some woman on the street. And according to the information I got, the dimwit has been pulling that hoof-beast shit all morning.”

Ms. Maryam stifles the smile forming, “Well after all that trouble, I hope you apprehended the offender.”

“Yeah if I had anything going for me today.”

“Oh?”

“The little shit kicked me in the shins and ran away with his dick hanging out!”

“You did not run after him?” The male troll glares at her. “Ah right, your-“

“Don’t start with me Kanaya! Not this morning.”

The female returns to the desk computer, “Well I’ll be sure to avoid the streets today at the very least. And I’ll inform the Chief, who I suspect will command that all officers keep an eye out for the perpetrator.” She turns back to Karkat, “Ms. Harley and Serket have arrived while you were out.”

“Thanks, and remind me on a daily basis never to come to work early again. I’m starting to think Vriska has the right idea.”

“Whatever you say Mr. Vantas. Everyone else has started for the day, so you might be able to take a short break.” Karkat nods for approval and walks in to the area where his fellow officers collaborate.

He quickly spots Jade and Vriska huddled close together looking over some papers. 

“How about this one Jade?” 

“Hmm . . . Nah. It’s a bit too costly to me.” Jade holds up another paper, “What do you think of this one?”

“Nope, the neighborhood sucks.”

“Really? It looks nice.”

“Trust me, a bunch of neighbor kids will throw rocks at your windows when you start moving in.” 

Jade frowns defeated, “Okay, then what about . . .”

Karkat swipes one of the papers from the pile, “Two to three bedrooms and a small bathroom with a fifty dollar monthly watering bill-Why are you two looking at apartments?”

“Jade’s moving,” Vriska answers without looking up. The woman gives an affirmative nod. 

“Moving where?”

Jade answers this time, “Oh somewhere near the department. I’m only looking at new apartments since mine was temporary anyways.”

“Temporary?”

“Oh right he doesn’t know, “Vriska realizes. “Jade’s passed!” The woman tries to hide her excitement, but fails miserably.

“Yup! I went to the Capital last week, and they reviewed my work here. They said I’ve improved so much that they made me an official officer, no longer in training!” Jade stands up from her seat and walks over to her partner. “So thanks Karkat,” she opens her arms up, “Hug?”

Karkat stares at her unsure of the situation, “Uh congratulations then.” Jade accepts that as a yes and pulls him into her arms. The troll gives her a quick pat on the back. Vriska watches them before snickering to herself. “What?”

“Oh nothing. Come on Jade, we need to find someplace for you to live.” Jade agrees and sits back down. 

“So I’m confused,” Karkat admits, “Are you looking for houses at the Capital?”

The woman grins sheepishly, “No. I’m staying in Skaia. Like I said my current apartment is temporary and I would like something more . . . permanent.”

“You’re not going back to the Capital? I thought that was your home.”

“Not really. Sure I had friends there, but I feel much more committed here with you guys!” 

Karkat scratches his head thinking. He then turns around to find the room’s television turned on to the local human news. “Ah fuck. Will someone turn that off?” 

“Can’t,” Jade answers. “Chief demands we leave it on at all times for the next week while the election is running. Oh I’m so excited! I registered as soon as I returned!”

“That’s really fucking great Jade. You’re probably the only life form in this whole Grub-damn city who will give a shit about this election. I mean come on! Only Vallens is running again this year.”

“Aww get excited Karkat! Voting is important to our political system! Don’t tell me you don’t vote.”

“No I vote. And every year I vote for the only person who could ever run this city with a shred of efficiency, me.”

Vriska rolls her eyes, “Like that’ll ever happen. You can’t even show your blood.”

“How do you-Fine.” Karkat starts to grumble to himself, “Not like I could save a lost cause like Skaia. Did you hear how Slick went on the news himself last week talking about how he was going to work on Skaia. Two words: lost cause.”

“Hey hey! Let’s calm down for a second!” Jade sooths. “We’re all friends here! Or colleagues.” The woman picks up coffee mug, “You want more coffee while I go to the break room Vriska?” 

“Sure,” she mutters handing Jade her cup. 

As Jade leaves, her coworker looks over the papers that are at Vriska’s side of the desk. Karkat soon catches a pattern, “Hey wait a second! Vriska, these are all in the center of Skaia.”

“Well you wouldn’t want Jade in Felt or Midnight Crew area would you?”

“But there’s also North and South of Skaia that I know Jade would prefer to Central. Not to mention, all these locations are close to the hospital.” Karkat continues to look over the documents, “And these apartments are too much for any officer’s salary! But that makes sense since they are two to three bedrooms listed.” The troll drops the papers in front of Vriska, “Explain.”

“I thought Jade might like a roommate. Someone to stay close by her and be a good friend.”

“You do realize that Jade has other friends that don’t have stability issues? What makes you so special?” Vriska looks down at the papers a little embarrassed.

“I’m one of her closest friends so I think she’d prefer me over-“

“Right, and you haven’t even asked her yet.” Karkat looks at Vriska disgusted, “Ugh, don’t tell me you’re going red for her.”

“What!”

“Dear Grub, you couldn’t even pretend to like that John guy any longer? Going after Jade now? Do you have any self-respect or do you have some freaky human fetish?”

Vriska stands up furious, “Is your head so far up your ass that you’re suffocating? Seriously! What you just said sounds like one of your shitty movie plots! Do you even have anything in that head of yours or is it full of hot air?”

“Look here Vriska,” Karkat growls at her, “I don’t want you to drag her in any of your shit. She’s too nice for you.”

“Karkat, I think it would be best if you mind your own fucking business.” She sits down and returns to the papers. The male troll turns to his own desk opening up a file for today’s work.

Jade shows up a few minutes later with two cups of coffee at hand, “Hey you won’t believe what happened! The coffee machine like broke down and-“ She then feels the tension in the air and nearly takes a step back shocked. Jade hands one of the mugs to Vriska and grabs a seat next to her. “Is everything all right?” she whispers to her friend.

“We’re fine, Jade. How about this apartment?” The troll offers one of the ads to her friend. 

A half hour of awkward quiet work passes between the three before the television grabs their, and everyone else in the room, attention. 

“And there were no survivors in Skaia’s mock zombie apocalypse,” An anchorwoman informs. “Now three students recount-Wait. I’m getting breaking news from Fourth Billiards Street. We now go to our field reporter to relay the scene. Phil?”

The news station switches over to a man standing outside a known area of Felt territory. “Thanks Barbra, I stand with Dr. Scratch, known and well respected professor of Skaia University, who is announcing today his candidacy for mayor of Skaia. Dr. Scratch, how strong do you feel your chances of winning are against our own Mayor of many years? You don’t have much time before election day, and not a lot of background experience with politics.” 

The doctor in questions stands proudly next to the reporter, “Please, call me Doc. And I think that you’ll find that Skaia has long desired a new leader to run this city. Skaia has been in ill care that only I can fix. I assure Skaia that only I have the ability to save this poor city, not Mayor Vallens. So next week, vote for me for a better future.”

All officers and Vriska watch the news cast in shock.

Karkat is the first one to open his mouth, “We are fucked.”


	2. Chapter Two

Vriska turns away from the television, “Want to look at apartments in Capital?”

Karkat grumbles, “I can’t even return to the Capital.”

“Not my problem. Jade,” the woman does not turn away from the screen. Vriska continues, “Do you think Feferi would still help me out if I transferred John?”

Jade snaps away from her concentration, “That’s it!” And she rushes out of the department telling Kanaya that she’s on her break. Vriska and Karkat watched her leave confused by the recent events. 

“I guess she’s got it?” Vriska wonders not quite sure what’s going on.

Karkat looks at a nearby clock, “It’s not even noon and I’m done with this day.”

Meanwhile, Officer Harley dashes though two streets of Skaia to an electronics store. Jade pounds a fist twice to her chest and lets out a low cough before entering.

Inside the store, the green-eyed lady spots a familiar troll standing alone eyeing several handheld devices. Jade hurries over to greet the friend.

“Feferi!”

The called at troll jolts at Jade’s outburst. “Jade? Wow my heart is pumping!” She moves her hand over her heart as if that’s going to calm it.

“Oh sorry! I was in a hurry and-I really freaked you out didn’t I?”

The troll is able to compose herself, “It’s fine. It was just so quiet here, and I was out of it. But enough about me, what are you doing here?”

“Run for mayor!” Jade blabs out.

“What?” she nearly laughs.

“Ah!” Jade shakes the stupidity out of her. “Right. Scratch is running for mayor.”

Feferi gasps, “Oh no! The same one that-“

“Yeah. So I thought you should run for mayor!” The troll stares at her.

“You think I should run for mayor?”

“Feferi,” Jade gently holds the troll’s arm, “Skaia needs a leader. A good leader. One that won’t abuse or neglect it like Vallens has or Scratch will. You can do that! You’re one of the most amazing people that I know. You’re kind to this city, you have a face already, and you’ve always wanted to lead people. This is your chance!”

The troll removes the woman’s grip, “Jade, the majority of this town would rather die than put me in power.”

“Then change their mind! Prove them wrong! If there’s anyone that can fix this city, it’s you. Please Feferi, Skaia needs you.”

Feferi watches the woman’s desperation. “You’re right. I’ve always wanted this opportunity, but have been too scared to take it. I just need that little push. Thank you Jade.”

“So you’ll run for mayor?!”

“Yes! In fact, I’m a little giddy now. Oh this will be so much fun! But one week! I’ll have to start planning immediately-“

“Hey FF, you won’t believe the greatest joke I heard-Jade?” Sollux walks up behind the two females. “Listen Jade, when you ask where I’m taking Feferi, I don’t want you to interrupt our date.”

“Oh Grub!” Feferi exclaims, “I’m sorry Guppy! I got all tangled in a net and forgot about you! How’s the latest toy?”

Jade nudges Feferi in the elbow, “Tell him!”

“Tell me what?” Sollux questions.

Feferi is a tad squeamish, “Well, I’m running for mayor.”

The male troll stares at her for two seconds, “Really.”

“Yeah.” Feferi uncomfortably scratches the back of her head. Sollux notices her discomfort and brings a smile to his face.

“You know what, that’s great.”

“Really! You’re okay with this?”

“A little last minute, but I think it’s a great idea. Just great! You’re sure to win!” 

Feferi moves in for a hug, “Oh I’m so glad you think so!” There is a little stiffness on Sollux’s side of the embracement. “I’ll need my mate to smile with me, statistics show that voters prefer couples!”

Her romantic companion runs his fingers through her hair, “Right.”

“Oh!” Feferi pulls away, “I need to go register. I’ll go call my driver to take us there. Or should we take a cab to appeal to more voters?”

“Uh cab,” Sollux answers.

“Definitely cab,” Jade confirms. Feferi lets out an excited squeal and leaves the store to retrieve a cab.

The woman turns to Sollux, “Are you alright?”

“Of course! Never better! What do you mean?”

“Like that doesn’t answer the question.” Jade turns on her heels to face Sollux in an almost intimidating way. “You’re acting weird. Don’t you want to support Feferi!?”

“It’s not that at all! I just-“ Sollux shrugs his shoulders, “I don’t want to ruin her chances.”

“What!? That won’t happen! If anything, Feferi dating a low blood for a long period of time will help her chances!” If Jade could see behind the troll’s colored glasses, she would see eyes roll.

“Sure Jade, it’s always so simple.” Sollux checks his clock, “Look, I have the day off, so could you please leave. I would like to scavenge some time left with my girlfriend.” 

She looks at him curious, “You’re not going to break up with her are you?”

“Of course not.” Sollux groans, “Look, can you please just leave.” The female officer frowns at her friend, but she follows his request while saying goodbye to her other friend on the way.

When Jade returns to her department, Vriska tries her best to comfort the human, but sadly Jade is too unsettled by recent events to relay them. And she thinks it’s best she lets others find out on their own.

It isn’t until the next day when everyone is informed by the news. The news reporter from yesterday stands with Feferi at his side in front of city hall. “Ms. Peixes, how are you going to confront this election so far in?”

“Well Phil,” she beams a smile to him and the camera, “I want to meet and address all issues of Skaia. You can learn my stand of such issues when I’ll accept any questions in the conference room at Third Street at three o’clock. I do hope you’ll be there.”

“Of course, Ms. Peixes. And good luck with your candidacy.”

“Thank you Phil.” The reporter then gives a sendoff while the camera returns to the anchorwoman. 

Officers Harley and Vantas return to their work, and Vriska returns to looking through apartments. Vriska cannot stay focused on the work and turns to Jade, “How much should I bet that you had a hand in that?”

Jade herself cannot help but smile happy at the turnout, “I just did what I thought would help Feferi. She seems capable enough.”

Karkat says nothing but rolls his eyes.

The phone in Jade’s purse vibrates; she takes it out and reads the new message. “Oh!” Jade looks to Vriska, “Do you want to go to Feferi’s press conference?”

“The press conference? Sounds boring.”

“It could be very interesting. Besides we would have to watch on the tv anyways, and Feferi is insisting we come.”

Karkat interrupts, “I don’t want to go.”

“Uh actually Karkat,” Jade awkwardly responds, “She didn’t say anything about you.” The troll officer stares at her bewildered as Vriska obnoxiously laughs at him. “Vriska!”

“Hahahahahahahaha! Fuck it, I’ll go support anyone who can shit on Karkat without even trying!” She calms down and fixes her hair, probably to mock Karkat since the slightest movements seems to anger him. Karkat turns back to his reports, “One of my closest friends’ matesprits becomes mayor, and I’m not invited to a fucking meeting.”

“You could come along Karkat,” Jade tries to encourage. 

“No, go have fun surrounded by pricks. I’ll be here surrounded by my own idiots.” He holds up a document, “Mr. Colbert is reported for a second offense of shop lifting.” Karkat picks up another, “Mrs. Benson is under arrested for unconsented assault on her kismesis. Maybe one of you would like to run for office? What’s that Mr. Colbert? Politics is fucking stupid and corrupt?! Right indeed. You should run for office since you have more brain cells than these two life forms in front of me!”

Vriska growls at him, “Hey Karkat, up yours!” Jade quickly moves to cover whatever sort of obscenity hand jester that would come from the troll’s hand.

After a large amount of settling down, the two females leave for Feferi’s conference. By the time they arrive, the area is almost filled with reporters and interested civilians. However, whether they come because they want Feferi to be the next mayor, or if they want to intimated her is unknown to the candidate as she steps forward. 

“My fellow Skaian citizens,” Feferi greets, “It is wonderful to see you all appear for this conference. I am sure my abrupt announcement for candidacy has raised a number of questions. So please, ask away.”

The first question goes to Phil the field reporter, “Phil Shemwell from Channel Six News. Ms. Peixes, how do you plan to handle the crime rate of Skaia.”

Feferi takes a deep breath standing behind the podium, “Mayor Vallens has been faulting on his duties to protect our city. I want to strengthen our forces and cease the intelligent crime gangs that abuse Skaia.”

A male troll in the back grabs her attention, “Cabula Rankua of “News on the Roll.” Orphans: love them or hate them?”

“Whether they are human, troll, or in between, I hope they find a loving home.”

A womanly reporter raises her hand, “Malinda Weisburg of ‘News of the Streets Weekly.’ Ms. Peixes, surely you know of the stereotypes your blood holds. How can you expect anyone that believes them to vote for you?”

“I have been living with those labels my entire life. That I’m a dictator, power hungry, a fish bitch, but I didn’t create those stereotypes. I had no impact on their creation. The Condesce did.” A chill quickly grows on the audience. The ex-empress’s title is so rarely said it’s practically taboo. The fact that Feferi used it so negatively and confidently is almost frighteningly awing. “I refuse to be labeled as such. That is simply not who I am.”

The next reporter, a troll, grabs her attention, “Clanto Shawol of ‘The Horny Journal.’ Just how do you plan to fight those stereotypes? They have lived for so long. How will you prove yourself?”

“Clanto, I have always given my time and resources to helping those in need. No matter their gender, blood, or race. I do sincerely care for them. If I ever have a fault, it’s that I care too much, and how bad can that be?” A small laugh comes out of the audience. “I have an incredibly open heart. And, to keep myself as distant from the Condesce to help prove it, I am giving my support to mixed race marriages.” 

An outcry rises out of the reporters as they try to contact their editors. This shit’s front page news, as some will inform. 

Only one reporter still manages to have the guts to confront such a weighty topic. “Aradia Megido of Reporting Times News on Channel Nine.” Silence like a knife cuts through the crowd as they pay attention. No one wants to miss Ms. Megido returning after her long break. 

Feferi smiles at the low blood, “Yes?”

“Can you prove it?” Aradia’s cold eyes watch for any response.

“I’m sorry?”

“It’s not a hard question,” she mocks. “Just prove it. You could prove support for low bloods, if you really did at all. What about mix marriages?”

The young candidate was expecting this question, but not from someone who once stood up for her. It was upsetting, not that Feferi could show it. “I am glad you asked that Aradia. Several months ago, I met a young troll who is engaged to a human. Sadly, the human endured a nearly fatal injury and still rests in a hospital with a coma. The troll herself went through neglect as no one respected a simple troll in love. She ended up sleeping on the streets slowing running out of money. When we met, I promised to help her turn her life around. I finance her fiancé’s life support with my own funds, and she’s now a model citizen working for Skaia’s police force.”

“Oh shit!” Vriska whispers to Jade. “I was really hoping she was talking about someone else.”

“And-“ Feferi continues, “I’m happy that she could take time out of her schedule to show support for me.” The sea troll gives an open hand pointing to Vriska. 

The spider troll instinctively edges closer to Jade not comfortable with this attention. 

Since everyone is looking at Vriska, no one can see Aradia sneer, “I though you said the fiancé was in a coma?” 

Jade raises a hand up, “Uh I’m just a supporting friend here. And I can like validate everything Ms. Peixes is saying. So you should all totally vote for her. . . right.”

Somewhere behind Feferi’s always-happy mask, she is shaking her head at this.

Aradia continues questioning the candidate, “I’m sorry, but I do believe that you met that troll ‘after’ she stole your valuables.”

“Well I did say I turned her life around!” Another smile beams on Feferi’s face.

After several more questions to clear the air on topics that neither Jade nor Vriska cared about. They go to Feferi’s limo to confront her when the reporters are gone. 

“Vriska I’m so sorry!” Feferi instantly says. A dark olive blood troll is fiddling away on his handheld. Sollux stands on her other side.

“Yeah well as embarrassments go, I’ve had worse. Don’t worry about it Peixes.”

Feferi sighs, “Thank goodness. I would never have done such a thing, but my campaign manager here insisted when I told him the story. I definitely needed something to convince the voters that I wasn’t baiting them.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Sollux comforts, “I think you convinced them.”

“Wow Feferi,” Jade struggles to get out. “Just wow. I would never imagine you taking that sort of campaign. It is you but . . .”

“I understand that it is usually political suicide, but I need something to stand out against my competitors. Voters would never side with me otherwise. I just hope those that do stand for what I believe in will have the guts to vote for me when the day comes.”

Vriska balances herself against the limo, “I honestly see no other chance for you to win. Maybe you’ll get brain dead high bloods to support you just because of your blood.” The limo driver then has a short spout to get the troll off the limo.

“I’m glad I have your support. . . I do have your support right? I mean I totally get if you want to keep it a secret-“

Jade butts in on her, “Of course I’ll vote for you Feferi!”

“Tell you what,” Vriska leans on the sea troll’s shoulder, “I’ll vote for you if you promise you’ll get me and John married whenever I say.”

She grins, “Why with my power, I promise to marry you two myself!”

“Hey Jade, I know who I’m voting for! Politics are fun!”

Feferi ignores the slight sarcasm, “Well in that case, could you help put up some posters? I can’t bribe all of my voters like you Vriska.” 

The three females walk to the back side of the limo where there is boxes filled with posters. Jade answers before Vriska could say no, “Sure thing Feferi!” The woman notices something, “Weren’t you going to start taking a cab?”

“Yeah,” she admits, “But my manager here says that being in a cab will show high class and maturity. Prestige if you will. And that others will want to be run by me.”

Jade hums to herself, “If you say so.”

“Ms. Peixes?” Feferi’s campaign manager calls for her. “You are being ‘challenged’ to a debate with the mayor and Scratch. Do you accept? It’s tomorrow night.”

Feferi looks up at her campaign manager with fire in her eyes. “Yes. I show confidence, maturity, and wisdom.”

“Good,” and he returns to his phone to confirm the debate.


	3. Chapter Three

A large mirror is held up on a wall in a dressing room of Skaia College’s Theater. Only the candidate for mayor, Feferi Peixes, is there pacing around the room. She looks at her own reflection pondering herself in her business apparel. A troll full of power and command; Feferi backs away shocked at the similarities between her and the old Empress.

“Hold it together!” She instructs herself. “You’re you. This is only nerves. You’re going to do fine.” Feferi, in hopes of calming down, looks over the notes her campaign manager handed her; nothing too trivial there, or comforting. She then pulls out her phone reading the message from Jade to assure herself where the human and her friends would be sitting. Feferi has looked at that message fourteen times already.

The sea dweller wants Sollux there with her. She wants someone to hold her and tell her she’ll be fine. He’s been so patient with her so far, and he’s assured her that she can look at him when answering. But she wants-no, she needs him with her now. Or anyone who can tell her she can do this debate.

The door to her room opens. Feferi turns around expecting anyone but Officer Vantas to be peering in. “Oh good,” he says coming in, “you’re decent.”

“Karkat? I didn’t expect-“

He interrupts her, “No kidding and by the way this isn’t going to leave the room.”

“Is something wrong?” Feferi eyes him curiously. “You’re not upset about me not inviting you yesterday are you? Jade told me and I didn’t think-“

Karkat closes the door behind him, “Oh my Grub! Shut up, I’m not some petty wiggler trying to gain favor! I’m here to tell you that you’ve fucked up.”

“What- How did I-?”

“At your stupid meeting yesterday, you involved Jade. And Vriska too I guess . . .” He adds as an afterthought. 

“Yes, but Jade and Vriska both said that they were fine-“

“No you idiot, you’re as stupid as both of them.” Karkat scrunches up his brow, “Listen, I’m about to give you some worthwhile advice. So open up those pathetic holes in your head called ears and hear me out. Don’t call out any connections to the Midnight Crew or the Felt.”

Feferi is undecided, calling out her opponents connections to mafias was her wild card. She takes a long sip from a nearby glass of water while Karkat waits impatient. “Karkat that information is important to tonight’s debate. The people need to know who they are voting for. I need to use it.” 

“And who the fuck told you that, your half-wit of a manager? Enough of Skaia can already guess that Scratch and Vallens are involved with organized crime. It’s written on their fucking faces.” Karkat starts to pace around worried and stressed. “I wasn’t going to confront you about this, but that-that fucking meeting of yours yesterday! You just had to involve them! Now if you become too much a risk they’ll hurt anyone sided with you as a lesson, and I can’t allow that!” Karkat looks slightly up at the sea dweller furious, “You should have kept your hands out of this election completely! They’ll hurt Jade now!”

“Karkat, I-“ Feferi isn’t sure what to say just yet, but she quickly finds out. “I’m sorry if you think I’m incapable for this position and that I’ve put Jade in jeopardy, but Jade is able to care for herself. Unlike you, I know that she is a strong woman who can handle anything thrown at her. And aren’t you no longer her mentor? She’s not some desperate child you need to roughly coddle.” The male troll opens his mouth to protest, but is interrupted. “And I’m not some incompetent, seaweed head that can’t help this city or save her friends! Karkat, you are not her guardian! Get over it!”

He backs away intimidated but sputters out, “She’s not ready yet.”

“I think that if you look back, she’s a lot more ready than you think.” Karkat looks down on the floor embarrassed with himself.

“You might be right there.”

Feferi turns to collapse on a couch, “Are you done harassing me?”

“I didn’t mean to-“ he sighs, “I did fuck this up didn’t I?” Feferi hums in agreement. “I only wanted to help in my fucking toilet of a mind. But I have my own worries, like whether I’ll have a job after this election or not.” Karkat moves closer to look down at the sea troll who is resting, “But you’re not looking so well yourself.”

She keeps her eyes closed, “I keep imaging that I’m going to barf on stage. Grub, what if there’s a question and I choke? Or if Scratch slams me on stage and I don’t have a comeback?” Feferi opens her eyes and pulls Karkat closer by his shirt, “What if I don’t have a comeback Karkat!?”

“Oh Grub!” He tries to release from her grip but it is too strong. “Fef-Feferi you’ll be great!” In a smaller, much weaker voice he wonders, “How the fuck are you so strong?” But Karkat senses that she is too distracted to answer that question, “You just need to pull out this inner power that you have out!”

Her grip relaxes, “Inner power?”

“Right, inner power!” Karkat continues to try to escape her, but now believes that her sharp nails have cut through his shirt. 

Feferi recognizes how uncomfortable the officer is, “Oh!” She immediately releases him embarrassed. “I’m so sorry; I don’t know what came over me.” The female troll covers her faces with her hands ashamed. Karkat backs away and realizes the damage that Feferi has.

“Are you going to be okay?” He realizes that that’s an idiotic question, “Okay . . . time for me to give you real advice, you do have ‘inner power.’ You know, what’s in your blood.”

She sighs, “I’m trying to distance myself from the Condescension.” Karkat grinds his teeth agitated by the name. 

“You still can. Historically, the . . Empress was able to hold power for generations. She had the ability to grasp the attention and have people obey her. No one dared to defy her, and that’s why she’s famous. Disliked by everyone and known as a tyrant, but at least she’s remembered from Alternia history; an ability that not many from Alternia have,” he ends appreciating. Feferi tilts her head thoughtfully and a bit amused.

“I would never have fitted you for supporting the Condescension.”

Karkat rolls his eyes and grunts, “I’m not. Only the idiotic dunderheads who can’t let go of the upper class hierarchy would support her. I just respect how she was able to control a whole species, but she can’t control humans apparently.” He looks back at the sea troll, “But in all solemnity, it’s all in the way you hold yourself. Act confidently and voters will respect that. Trust me Feferi, you’ll do fine. You really are the best candidate out there.”

“Thank you Officer Vantas.”

“You’re welcome Future Mayor Peixes.” Feferi giggles at the name and turns her head to the side looking relaxed. The other troll turns around to leave but stops, “What the fuck?”

Feferi looks up concerned, “What is it?” Karkat looks back at her.

“Why am I the one helping you out when you have a boyfriend? Shouldn’t Sollux be the one here, not me?”

“Sollux,” she pauses for a second, “Sollux has been great with me so far. He’s been supporting me through everything. Tonight he’s just sitting with the audience to get the feel with them, I can understand that.”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “So instead of staying backstage encouraging you now and being there for right after the debate, he’s out with the audience.”

“Ugh, don’t phrase it like that. And just when we were starting to be friends,” Feferi turns to take a sip of her water.

“We’re not-it’s not that. You see, Sollux is . . . weird.”

“Weird? Seriously? Are you going to start pulling dead fish that’ll stink up my performance? Again?”

The officer snarls at her, “This isn’t about you. If anything, I’m just clearing shit up about Sollux.”

“Jade’s right, you really are too mysterious.”

“Agh! Fucking Grub shit! This isn’t about me being idiotically cliché either! I basically don’t know what’s with Sollux. I’m not the mysterious one; he is!”

“What’s strange about Sollux?” Feferi questions concerned. 

Karkat throws his hand up frustrated, “That stupid secret of his.”

“Secret?” 

“Oh great, his matesprit doesn’t know. I guess I’ll never fucking find out!”

“Alright Karkat,” Feferi frowns, “I think you should leave if you’re going to spurt empty bubbles at me.”

“No we actually should talk about this,” he takes a seat down across the female. “You need to understand something about Sollux that you’ve made much more complicated for him.”

“Hear me out Karkat, I do care about Sollux, but if you’re going to talk like a clam then don’t bother trying to open up at all!” Karkat looks at her annoyed but persists.

“No one appreciates the dramatics that great cinema has gifted us for our pathetic lives.” The sea dweller glares at him; she is not going to deal with sidetracking anymore. “Sollux should be the Chief of Police by now.”

Feferi watches him waiting for Karkat to reveal that this is a stupid joke, but that isn’t even his style. “How is that? He’s only an officer.”

“The troll is weird; he’s denied any sort of promotion he’s offered. I’ve overheard the Chief wanting him to be his replacement, and that’s something for the sweat coaster to endorse a low blood. But Sollux says no. He told me once that he likes his pathetic, meaningless job; a bunch of hoof-beast shit if you ask me.”

“I-“ Feferi lays back on the couch, “He’s never shared anything like that before.”

Karkat shrugs his shoulders, “I’ve managed from observation to figure out an idea of why, and let me tell you that that was absolutely worth avoiding boring paper work.”

Feferi feels guilty, “I need to respect his privacy, let him keep his secrets.”

“No I feel the same way. I have my own secrets, but the numbskull you’re fucking ‘accidently’ found out. So I figured I need his to even out the field.”

“And you two are friends?”

“Yeah and don’t fucking question it. I’m not questioning your relationships.” 

“You just called my matesprit a numbskull and have been questioning his concern for me.”

“And I thought you said no more sidetracking.” Karkat scoots up in his seat, “Why don’t you start saying some stupid fish puns so you can feel less awkward and we can go back on track.” Feferi stares at him uncomfortable. “I heard that stupid drunk dial you gave Sollux. You know, the guy we’re supposed to be talking about.” The two stare at each other annoyed.

Feferi squints her eyes, “Why don’t you tell me what’s so fishy about Sollux then?”

Karkat could say something about stupid fish puns really do help the situation get at ease, but he should stay on topic more. Perhaps that is why he’s never able to finish his work alone and that he needs someone at his side. But isn’t that the way life is? One document is organized in life and another one is shortly handed back. It’s only with the power of teamwork when the papers are organized and fun can begin. So in the end, Karkat needs to unite his allies together to overcome the greatest enemy of all time: paperwork.

Officer Vantas understands that that is stupid and anyone thinking that is just as well. Fuck you brain. Fuck you.

“Sollux doesn’t like attention.”

Feferi stares at him concentrating, “That doesn’t make sense. He loves spending time with me.”

“It’s not one-on-one attention that I’m talking about, it’s public attention. Having a whole room look at you at once; whatever it is, he hates being looked at.” Karkat frowns to himself, “Probably why he doesn’t take interviews too.”

“Oh Grub!” Feferi rubs her face, “And I’ve pulled him into a highly public spot! No wonder he’s been off.”

“Honestly, I can’t believe he’s still with you.”

The sea dweller pulls her knees up to comfort herself, “I know. Breaking up with your matesprit during a campaign is privacy suicide. It’s better to stay with me for that to leave me. I wonder when he’ll be able to leave if it’s just to keep himself isolated.”

“Feferi,” Karkat’s guiltiness causes him to realize his mistake, “I totally be wrong. And I’m sure Sollux loves you. He’s stayed with you so far; why would he even date you in the first place if you’re such a public figure?” He leans back a little, “Please don’t grab me again.”

“Oh I won’t. I just feel lost right now.”

“No no no no no. I’m not fucking your feelings up again. Get . . happy again or something! Damn it say another fish pun!” Feferi does not listen to him; Karkat’s words have little effect. “Feferi, I’m going to give you this last bit of brain knowledge and then I’ll leave before I fuck things up again. Sollux is a fucking baby. It’s his fault, not yours, that he’s keeping secrets from you. You didn’t know; therefore, not your fault. Let Sollux tell you when he’s ready. And you know what else? I highly doubt that that loser nerd even has a decent secret. He probably sings teenage girl pop songs.”

Feferi lightly laughs, “You’re right Karkat. You know what, I’m positive you’re right. Not that he listens to songs like that, but it’s nothing to worry about. I’ll just wait for him to tell me, I love him too much to let that get in our way.”

“Yeah well just as long as I didn’t fuck things up with you. I don’t need Sollux against me.”

“Right . . . By the way, what blackmail does Sollux have on you?”

Karkat’s mouth turns thin, “Uh we had a minor mishap during combat practice. Something just, ‘leaked out.’”

“And that’s enough for you to look for blackmail on Sollux? Sorry, but that doesn’t really help my confidence over his secret.”

“Well how do you feel about the debate?”

“Actually,” Feferi thinks about it for a second, “I do feel more confident.”

“Great,” Karkat stands up and Feferi gasps from noticing the holes in his shirt.

“I am so sorry! I can’t believe that I did that!”

The officer looks disapprovingly at his shirt, “It’s fine, I guess. I’ll probably wear my coat all night.”

“Hold on one second,” she interrupts him reaching for her purse. “I ruined it; I can at the very least pay for a new one.” Feferi hands him a large sum of cash that makes Karkat’s eyes go wide.

The male troll hesitantly grabs the bills and looks through them, “Feferi, this is a lot. Way more than what the shirt cost.”

“Please, take it.”

Now Officer Vantas knows that a greater man would refuse to take the money, but he is not a man. “Alright thanks,” he says shoving it into his coat pocket. Karkat puts on the coat and says goodbye to the sea dweller who feels certain that this debate will go great for her.

And so it does.

Skaia’s debates were once a profound engagement that created thrilling questions and caused the audience to debate their decision themselves. However, with the passage of time and the change of today’s media, a debate in Skaia could only be comparable to a showy beauty pageant. One that causes the moderator, this night it’s Channel Nine’s female news anchor Kharlotti, extreme anger for having to use questions from social internet media like www.AnnoyingBirdNoises.com. And as a result, Skaia hears responses such as . . .

Mayor Vallens, “Of course Skaia has the best parades. Who could say otherwise?”

Doctor Scratch, “We need more puppets! Puppets will make this city shine. Imagine all the birthday parties for children now having a puppet show. Beautiful isn’t it?”

Feferi Peixes, “Any half-decent party needs to have the perfect banquet, orchestra, scenery, and not have the host get kidnapped in the middle of the party. Isn’t that right Mayor Vallens?”

But these debates never hit the hard questions that can affect the citizens’ future, but the people of Skaia don’t want that. They don’t want to know who can run their city the best if their candidate is able to get the office, but they want someone who looks good leading them. The citizens know that their city is the sewers in comparison to the Capital, but they want someone who can make them feel like everything’s okay. This is in no way a good idea for them to live by, but if the mayor can make them feel prestige, then the mayor can do whatever he or she wants. Luckily no mayor has abused this power as they want to run a decent city and not look like idiots. So in the end, both the citizens and the mayor want their city to improve, just not for the same or right reasons.

And back in her dressing room, Feferi is greeted by her close friends. They send her congratulations and assurances that she did great, the troll politely smiles and graciously accepts their comments while pointing out a few of her own mistakes.

Feferi then, to everyone’s surprise, thanks Karkat. “I don’t know if I would have done so well without you Karkat. I would have been a fish out water!”

“Uh,” the troll officer looks warily around him, “It’s not a problem. Anytime I suppose?”

“Really?” Feferi tilts her head coming up with an idea.

Officer Harley prods her partner in the shoulder, “What did you do?”

“Nothing!” He whispers back.

The sea dweller should have heard this short conversation, but after her minor thanks to Karkat, her campaign manager stepped in.

“Alright Feferi, you did good. Everybody loved you. Well not everybody, but you probably gained some votes. Now I’m going to set you up for a party . . . and I’m sorry but the boyfriend has to go.”

Feferi tightly grabs her matesprit by the arm, “Excuse me?”

“I know you think it’s cute, but the polls say that he’s too low; they think you’re faking it with him.”

Vriska inclines down to Jade’s ear, “Sollux probably gets that a lot.”

“Sollux and I are not faking anything!” Feferi argues, “He is my matesprit!”

The other troll holds up a clipboard, “You can say that as much as you want, but the polls would rather have you date a troll with a higher blood color.”

Sollux tries to relax his girlfriend, but she is relentless, “No. I’m tired of changing myself for the public. I deserve better than that. Uzekib, you’re fired.”

He shakes his head, “Don’t even try to fire me, you’ll lose by a landslide without me!”

“And if I that happens then I would still be me. You’re fired.” Frustrated, the troll leaves with shaking fists. Feferi turns back to her friends exhausted.

Sollux grabs her hand and stares into her eyes, “FF, you didn’t have to do that. We could have tried something else, or-“

“No. I don’t want any lies or secrets to come between us. I love you.” Sollux brings a tiny smile to his face and kisses her forehead, but he cannot see the mild disappoint Feferi has on her face.

Karkat makes a disgusted noise, “Ugh, I’m going to leave before this gets any more graphic.”

“Yeaaaaaaaah,” Vriska says edging away, “This is weird.”

“You two are horrible,” Jade insults, but she turns back to look at the two matesprits who are now sharing multiple light kisses. “Okay yeah let’s get out of here.”

Feferi abruptly pulls away from kisses, “Wait Karkat!” She walks over to him so he cannot escape, “I want you to be my campaign manager!”

“That the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard on the face of this brainless planet. Why would you want me to be your campaign manager, I don’t even like the people you’re trying to win over! I don’t like anybody!”

The sea dweller continues to smile, “Well okay then, not my campaign manager, but how about motivator? You were wonderful to talk to before, I would like that. Besides, you said anytime, and I would pay you for your services; a motivator is a real job.” Karkat can only stare at her bewildered, and he isn’t the only one in the room doing the same thing. “Karkat,” Feferi continues, “I know you care about this city, you’re a police officer! So please help me with this one thing, I can handle speeches on my own, but I need someone to help me prepare. Please?”

Karkat rubs his face frustrated, “There’s no fucking way out of this is there?”

“Well you could say no.”

“Right, like it would be that easy. Fine! I’ll help your stupid campaign.”

Feferi squeals in delight, “Thank you so much Karkat! This election will go swimmingly with my friends by my side!” She then bounces over back to Sollux excited.

However Karkat is frozen in place bewildered, “Friends? Oh fuck me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve been writing PoliceForcestuck for a whole year . . . wow. But thanks to everyone who’s supported me thus far and has enjoyed the series. I’m sorry that updates have been slow lately, but my life has other demands from me. But I do intend to see this series to the end. But seriously thanks everyone for reading!


	4. Chapter Four

A white van with the logo of Channel Nine on its side drives through Skaia to the regal houses of the area. The Peixes House is lit up from the inside out with other cars parked around. A closer look from the outside can reveal several servants caring for guests; the guests on the other hand range from classy to common citizens. 

Field reporter, Aradia Megido steps out from the van and calls her cameratroll over, “Right here.” The other troll sets up his camera ready to capture. 

“Ready when you are Aradia.”

She nods back at him and holds up her hand, “Start in five . . four . . three . . two . . And good evening Skaia. It’s Election Day in Skaia and I hope you all voted. The polls are closed and all that waits is too tally up the results. I’m outside The Peixes Manor that, as you can see behind me, is filled with eager citizens waiting for the results of tonight’s election. I’ll report back with candidate Peixes for an interview.”

“And we’re out,” the cameratroll says. Aradia’s mood deflates and she rolls her eyes to the mansion.

“Let’s get this over with,” she responds tucking her microphone in her side bag.

Her coworker is busy with the equipment, “You go on while I make sure the footage is sent and we can begin working. You can-“

“I’ll find her. I know my job.” Aradia leaves him and walks into building. 

A servant offers to take her coat as soon as she enters, and another one offers her refreshments. Aradia accepts both causing her to give up her coat and grabs a glass of white wine; she carefully sips the beverage as she scans the room. 

The mansion holds approximately three hundred people in various rooms; there is a television in each room presenting the numbers. The guests all spend their time conversing with one another and all together having a pleasant time. Feferi is no doubt hiding in one room entertaining a group, but Aradia finds someone else of interest.

The reporter walks over to the tall, boxy troll who has his back to her. Aradia moves light on her feet over to him; she lets out a loud cough to grab his attention.

Chief Zahhak turns around shocked by her appearance, “Ara-Miss Megido. What a surprise.”

She knows better and takes a sip out of her drink, “You shouldn’t lie to me Equius, I know better.” Aradia’s deadpan face looks around, “Isn’t this the type of scenery you’ve always dreamt of taking me too, if I was a blue blood of course.”

He starts to perspire, “You mustn’t talk about that with so many people around.”

“You worry too much.” The reporter lamentably replies, “I know this crowd, they’re all too busy with this affair to pay attention to our extinct one. Besides, how strange is it for a reporter and the chief of police to be talking? I could be asking you about tonight’s events.”

“Why are you talking to me at all?” he whispers. “You’ve been distant to me and Nepeta since your . . .”

“I remember Equius, I still have scars.” Aradia lowers her turtle neck to show the marks on her neck; almost purple in color. She withdraws her hand, “Tell me, do you love having Vriska above you in bed?”

Equius coughs, “Nothing like that has ever happened!”

“Really? I thought she would have jumped on you the first opportunity she got.”

“I don’t love Vriska.”

“Pleaaaaaaaase,” Aradia responds imitating the spider troll. “When we broke up that must have been a dream come true for you. Finally, you can be with a blue blood and not be held down by some lewd rust blood.”

“Aradia you know I didn’t love you because of your blood; I’m more than that.”

“Lies aren’t true if you repeat them. And as much as this conversation has been fun, I have to find a certain sea dweller.”

Equius touches her shoulder stopping Aradia, but he can’t say what he needs to so he asks a common question used tonight, “So who did you vote for?”

“Scratch,” she answers dully.

He is curious, “Why did you vote for him? At least Ms. Peixes would support our type of relationship.”

“Grub Equius, our relationship isn’t illegal despite what you think. But I voted for Scratch because I know that he is the best for mayor, and he will win.”

The chief looks up at the numbers, “It’s too close to tell at this point, what makes you so sure?”

“Because the spirits tell me so.”

Equius hides his panic, “Why do you listen to them when they aren’t good for you.”

“One, don’t tell me what’s good for me. Two, because I know they are right. They are always right.”

“How do you even know if they are right?”

Aradia glazes blankly at him, “Because they tell me that they are right.”

“Aradia, are you even listening to yourself?” Equius whispers, “You used to never act according to what they say.”

“Well I guess we both are doing what higher beings tell us to do.” She looks past him, “Excuse me, not that this conversation was lovely or anything, but I have to go.”

The reporter walks past him to a pair of horns she hopes belong to Feferi Peixes. She is right; the sea dweller was busy conversing with a small party before being interrupted by Aradia. 

Feferi turns surprised, “Oh! Hello Ms. Megido. It’s lovely having you here.”

“Wonderful party Ms. Peixes,” she greets bring a relaxed smile to her face. “I’m here to talk to you and report on the night.”

“Oh sure! Would you prefer sitting or standing? And call me Feferi.”

“Sorry Ms. Peixes but I prefer to stay detached; also standing somewhere would be nice.” Feferi looks at her a bit strained, but shows her a quieter but public area they can record.

“Hey FF,” Sollux whispers, “Good luck!”

Karkat nods his head approvingly, “Don’t let any pointless shit-bitching’s talking get to you.” The sea dweller turns around to smile at both of them. 

The two male trolls soon after follow her to the interview where others are watching; while they are standing, Sollux turns to Karkat, “You’ve been doing a good job helping Feferi out.”

Karkat doesn’t turn to look at him, “Yeah I guess.”

“She’s been really confident lately, and happier.”

The other troll just sips his alcohol.

“Listen to me,” Sollux lowers his voice, “If you dare try to take her away from-“

The other troll turns to him, “What the shit-fucking piss are you spitting out at me? Do you really think I would try to fuck her?” The two trolls realize that Feferi is occasionally glancing at them so they try to remain calm.

“I’m not worried about Feferi, but I am concerned about you. You did cheat on your last wife.”

It takes everything Karkat has not to scream at him, “Fuck you Sollux you piece of ass fucking shit. I think you should be more concerned about yourself if you’re so insecure that you’ll lose your girlfriend.” Sollux looks down embarrassed. “Yeah fuck you. Tell Feferi I’m going outside to smoke, if you know you can trust her not to come rushing out to fuck me. I thought you were my friend,” and Karkat leaves outside ignoring all around him.

“-And the idea that we can swim with fish during school is too amazing not to try!” Feferi says. 

The reporter smiles back, “Thanks you Ms. Peixes.” Aradia turns back to the camera, “We’ll report back when the decision is made for Candidate Peixes to make her speech.” The camera then shuts off, and Aradia stretches her back, “I’ll find you later.” Without waiting for any response from Feferi, she leaves grabbing a drink on the way out into the crowd.

The sea dweller continues to smile as she walks back to her matesprit, “How did I do?”

“Perfect,” he responds, “not that it matters. They already voted for you.”

“Oh it’ll always matter. Hey Sollux, where’s Karkat?” Feferi wonders searching the crowd.

He brings her face over to his, “He needed some time alone.”

“Well if he insists.” Sollux appears to Feferi like he’s distant, so she grabs his head to look into his eyes, “Hey, I love you my little guppy.” 

The officer opens his mouth to reply, but Feferi is tapped on the shoulder by one of her servants, “Ms. Peixes, you have someone requesting you in your office.”

“Who?”

“I apologize Ms. Peixes, but he preferred to be anonymous.”

“Well can it wait?”

“I don’t believe so.”

Feferi sighs, but tells Sollux that she’ll be back soon and follows her servant. 

Inside her office, Feferi finds someone she didn’t expect at her event, “Mayor Vallens?”

The man holds up his hand, “Please, just call me William. I don’t want any titles to come between us here.”

“What are you doing here? You should be at your own party!”

“There’s not much point of a party if I’m losing,” he points to the television in the room that shows Feferi barely ahead of Scratch in the votes so far, but Vallens far far behind. “Besides, nobody really ever noticed me.”

“It’s only fifty-five percent so far, you could still win.”

William laughs, “Not this time. But don’t fret for me, I didn’t even want to win this year. In fact that’s why I came here; I wanted to wish you luck.”

“I’m sorry but I don’t understand.”

“I hated being mayor. I thought it was all democracy and the system was a wonderful process. But it’s not. It’s a corrupted idea that makes me the dog to Skaia’s cruelest.”

Feferi is startled, “I never knew that you identified Slick and the Midnight Crew.”

“Of course, I’m not an idiot, but I did have to pretend to be so everyone was in the same boat as you. But to go on everyday like he was my friend. Giving him what he wants to save my city. Watching him . . . flirt with the woman that I love, but I’m too cowardly to tell her how I feel so she thinks I’m an idiot. That’s all that I am at this point, a cowardly idiot. But I’m too much of one to trust someone else to take my position. I didn’t know if they could go through what I do. So I’m here asking if you can. I know that Scratch will only make this city worse, but you are the only candidate that I’ve met who actually wants to save this city. There are good people in this town who will sacrifice something that they love in order for the peace of Skaia. Will you sacrifice for this city?”

“I will William.”

He smiles relieved, “Thank you Feferi. I wish you luck on this election. Do whatever you can for the good of Skaia. I’ll leave you now.”  
Feferi nods back and returns to her party quickly finding Vriska and Jade.

“There you are Feferi!” Jade exclaims. “I was wondering where you disappeared to.”

“I had some business to handle.”

Vriska is chewing on some appetizers, “Well you and Scratch are neck in neck still with eighty percent of the votes in.”

“Any minute now.”

Jade pats her friend on the back, “Hey, we’re here for you no matter what.”

“You guys have been great throughout this whole ordeal, thank you.”

“And all you have left is your victory speech!”

Vriska is able to keep a server standing right by her while she eats, “I wish there was a channel that didn’t have all these fucking commenters. As if I care about their predictions.” Feferi smiles at her friends graciously.

“Ms. Peixes?” Another servant walks up to her holding a phone, “I’m sorry but I have a call for you.” The troll idly picks up the phone and brings it to her ear.

“Good evening Feferi Peixes, are you having fun at your little get-together?” a cool voice asks her.  
Feferi is immediately unnerved yet entranced, “. . . Who is this?”

“Yes. I suppose that we haven’t had a chance to talk personally without any cameras to watch us. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Doc Scratch. For this conversation you’ll refer to me as Doctor Plushy-Bottom.”

The sea dweller looks around expecting some type of prank, “What.”

“We wouldn’t want anyone to overhear our conversation would we?”

“I get that, but why Doctor Plushy-Bottom?”

“Because no one would ever suspect that you’re talking to me.”

Feferi is tempted to hang up, “Is this a prank?”

“No my dear, while I do love pranks, I wouldn’t use such tactics on a serious occasion as this one. Now look at the screens that I’m sure you have set up all over your mansion.” Feferi glances up, she is barely leading with the votes. “Isn’t that a nice feeling? The belief that you could ever beat me, but you’re not going to win.”

She gulps, “I will.”

“No. No you won’t.” Those few words were able to give a sickly feeling in the bottom of Feferi’s stomach. “You never stood a chance. This election was never intended for anyone but me to win. Tell me, how do you feel? I am a certified doctor.”

“I feel horrible Doctor Plushy-Bottom,” she found herself willing tell him.

“I know you do. It’s never good feeling to believe that you’re going to win only to be defeated by someone you never stood a chance against. One day you might understand, but for now I have some options for you and I know you’ll accept them.”

Feferi moves to a nearby chair to sit down, and her friends take notice of her fatigue. Jade kneels down, “Feferi? Are you alright?” The troll only shakes her head at the woman. Even Vriska leaves the food to comfort the candidate.

“Hey Princess, why are you so down?” Vriska jokes. “You’re ahead the polls-“ she looks back at the screen to see that Scratch was winning with only three percent remaining to be tallied . . . two percent . . . one percent . . .

Commenters appear back on the screen announcing the winner and new mayor of Skaia. Feferi ends her conversation and puts the phone down. She stands up and walks to the stand in the room to address her supporters, and her two nearby friends have nothing to say to her.

Karkat is able to run up Feferi before she reaches the stand, “Look we can-“ She ignores him completely creating a befuddled Karkat.

Sollux is by the stand and gives Feferi a required hug. She embraces him tightly and walks up the stage. 

Feferi looks at the crowd from behind the podium and takes a long drink of water from a glass on the podium.

“Citizens of Skaia, I will be forever grateful for what you have done. The support has encouraged me throughout this election, and I couldn’t have gotten this far without you. I realize that we have lost, but that does not mean that this is the end. In fact,” she stops herself for a second, “In fact I believe Dr. Scratch will be a wonderful mayor. One of the best there is.” There is muttering within the crowd. “And that is why when Dr. Scratch takes his position, I’ll be standing beside him as his deputy.” Now there is total uproar by this small piece of information.

“And that ends Candidate Peixes,” Aradia address the camera, “But it brings new life to Deputy Peixes. How long has this been planned? Well perhaps that’ll be answered by our new mayor. This is Aradia Megido reporting live from Peixes Mansion saying goodnight.”

Feferi heads down from her stage to lean on her matesprit. He doesn’t say anything, he just holds her close to him. 

Jade, Vriska and Karkat hurry over confused. “Feferi,” Karkat starts, “what the actual fuck were you thinking? You didn’t tell me any of this! And you can’t work for Scratch!”

The sea dweller continues to rest on her matesprit, “I do appreciate you, all of you, but I just can’t right now. I-I need to be with Sollux right now.” Already guests are exiting her mansion.

“Feferi . . .” Jade tries to come up with something to say, but she can’t think of anything. The ex-candidate and her partner leave the three, and Karkat shortly after returns home bitter thus abandoning Jade and Vriska alone.

The spider troll looks down at her friend, “Are you okay?”

“I-I,” small tears start to falls from Jade’s face, “I don’t understand what happened! Why is Feferi just-just giving up?” Vriska is startled, but takes quick action by hugging her friend. “Feferi is my friend! Why didn’t she tell me?” Jade cries while Vriska escorts her out of the mansion. “Damn it! Why do I always fuck things up? Why am I so weak?” She gets calm in Vriska’s arms, “He was right. I should never have left.”

Vriska slowly raises her hand and carefully paps her friend’s head, “Shoooooooosh, no you’re not weak. You are a strong woman, and Karkat is wrong like always.” 

Jade starts to calm down in Vriska’s embrace, “It’s not . .” She would finish but she is far too happy with Vriska’s comforting.

“Don’t worry Jade, I’ll always be here for you.”


	5. Inauguration

“Okay Vriska,” Jade says bending down to the end of her couch, “on three. One . . two . . three!” The two females lift the couch up by the ends and start walking into their new apartment.

Vriska paces her breath as she helps carry the couch, “How are you doing Jade?”

The woman carries her side of the couch with little trouble, “I’m fine. All right now we have some stairs. I’ll go up first. Ready?” The troll sighs but moves on with the furniture. 

Once the females are able to carry the couch up to their destination, they set it down in a large empty room of the apartment. Vriska collapses on the couch, “Why do you have such a heavy couch?”

“Don’t worry,” Jade pats on the couch affirmatively. “This is a great couch.” The troll just groans.

“Hey,” a man from behind their television set says with no enthusiasm, “I’m workin’ back here, so turn down the volume.”

Rose walks up to the apartment carrying a cardboard box, “Dave there’s no need to get angry. We wouldn’t want your blood pressure to go up.”

Dave ducks back down to the cords, “Haha very funny. This is not worth free pizza; there better be at least some fucking Doritos with that shit.” Kanaya just then walks up behind Rose with her own box.

“Where would you like these?” 

Jade points to her left, “Those go in my bedroom.” 

“So we’re stealing the neighbor’s cable right?” Dave asks, “because we totally can.”

“We are not stealing cable,” Jade orders. “How do you even know this?” 

The man shrugs from behind, “My job requires a variety of abilities.”

Rose comes back in to the living-room-to-be, “He’s a porn director,” she answers with pride.

“It’s a very important job,” Dave reassures. “So many people would just go crazy without porn; it would be like fucking Dooms Day. Terezi!” he yells towards the kitchen, “I need your help with wires. Which one do I cut? Hurry, little Billy needs his heart transplant and I can’t cut the wrong wire!” Terezi just walks in from the kitchen like there’s nothing unusual about what Dave just said.

Jade turns to Rose, “Was I supposed to understand that?”

“Probably not.”

Vriska lifts herself up from the couch, “Way to go on recruitment.”

Jade pats the troll on the back, “They work cheap.”

Rose smirks at the two, “So when did you two ‘get together?’”

“Hehe,” Jade giggles embarrassed, “Well Vriska and I just realized after a while that we treated each other like moirails, so what was the big issue of not going for it? Besides, I don’t know if I’m comfortable with Vriska in that apartment by herself.”

Vriska searches through a box, “It’s also waaaaaaaay cheaper this way. Jade,” she holds up a dvd, “movie night!”

Jade’s dog, Bec trots up the stairs holding a box in his teeth. He hands the box off to Vriska and head back down. Jade smiles at their interaction, “Everything just worked out surprisingly simple. Even Bec likes her!”

Rose smiles light-heartedly, “In any case, congratulations to you both. I’m sorry but that is the proper way to address this, correct?” 

“It’s just perfect Rose.”

The blonde woman smiles and wanders to another room, but not before touching Kanaya on the shoulder expectantly. The troll turns her head around blushing green right in front of Jade.

Kanaya looks at Jade who is snickering, “What?!”

“I didn’t know you and Rose hooked up.” Kanaya pulls Jade away.

“I-We-uh . . . We aren’t,” she rubs her arm embarrassed. “I actually don’t know where we are standing. I think I might be flirting with her, but I don’t get any sort of reaction that would indicate what she feels for me.”

“Have you told her your feelings?”

“Wh-What if she doesn’t reciprocate my feelings for her? What if she doesn’t support mixed-species, and if I ask her out on a date she becomes offended and disregards our friendship altogether?”

Jade sighs annoyed, “Seriously Kanaya? At this point you’re just making excuses. For Pete’s sake, she’s helping a human and troll moirails move in together, and the troll is engaged to a human! I don’t think she’s against mixed relationships.”

“But that doesn’t mean that she wants to be in one.”

“That’s true.” Jade leans back thinking, “Well Kanaya, I see that you can either confront your feelings for her and let her know, or move on.”

“I don’t really like those options.”

The woman laughs, “It comes with being an adult, making tough decisions.” Jade looks back to make sure that Vriska isn’t paying attention, “I’m at least glad you aren’t trying to date Vriska.”

“Don’t remind me. There just comes a point where I’m tired of chasing lost causes.”

“She really does love John,” Jade reassures. 

“Perhaps, but what will happen to Vriska when she gets tired of chasing an impossible dream?”

Jade sighs realizing that that’s very possible, but does not care to continue the conversation, “Hey you’re sure that Rose is single right? I mean she hasn’t told me anything.”

“That-“ Kanaya struggles to say, “is another concern that I have. Rose has not mentioned that she is seeing someone, but the way she behaves presumes that she is taken, at least it seems so to me.” The troll looks over to Dave and Terezi, “I often wondered if she was with Dave, but I cannot decipher their conversations long enough to know for sure.”

“Really? I thought Dave and Terezi were a sure thing.”

“They aren’t though,” she explains. “Perhaps if they stopped talking around each other and just get serious, then they could. But to my knowledge they are still just friends and are too nervous to flirt with the other.”

“I wouldn’t get that idea from them,” Jade questions eyeing the two curiously.

“No they hide behind those glasses as if they were walls.”

Jade turns to Kanaya now inquisitive, “Okay, how did you learn to be so observational?”

Kanaya blushes again, “I gain certain skills when my job requires me to watch and organize the lives of my friends.” 

“Does it really require that?”

“Not really, but Mr. Vantas has special needs.”

The woman starts to back away from her friend, “Wow this whole conversation just makes me feel more confident about my relationships. I mean, I got my moirail living with me and we’re doing great! And I got my-“

Dave interrupts from in front of the television, “I think you should get over here. You said you wanted to watch the inauguration didn’t you? Well shit’s getting started right now.”

Everyone gathers to the set to watch as Scratch accepts his position with his hand laid on The Great Peace Treaty. Short words are said before the new mayor stands behind a podium to make his speech. “My fellow Skaians, we have endured so much from the feeble rule of Vallens. But a new age is introduced; an agenda that I will begin straightaway just as I promised. So my first order of business is that I step down from my position. Such action will give Ms. Peixes new employment. Thank you.” And just like that, the man steps down from the podium with no one to object except for the press that waits to ambush him. Scratch turns around to an obviously stunned Feferi who was previously waiting beside him and says, “Don’t mess this up.”

Feferi is so completely shocked that someone has to push her to be sworn in and then again to get her to the podium. At this time she has barely said more than “I will,” and she now stands behind the podium with the entire city watching her. She has no speech prepared, and no idea what just happened or is happening. 

Later that night in the office of the most previous mayor . . .

Eridan Ampora slams his fist on the table, “Are you crazy?” His boss, Scratch merely fixes the rattled objects that had tipped over from the bang. 

“Calm down Mr. Ampora. Damaging my trinkets won’t answer any questions.”

“No! I trusted you when you made Fef deputy, but now you explain to me why she is the mayor! That was not part of the plan!”

The doctor laughs to himself, “It was always part of the plan. Don’t try to figure out the plan when you have no way of knowing yourself.”

“Tell me know now! Letting Fef be the mayor is the last thing I wanted to have happen.”

“But it is exactly what needed to happen.” He picks up a bowl of candy, “Have some.” 

Eridan knocks the bowl away from him furious, “No. No more candy. No more secrets. You tell me everything now!”

Scratch sighs disappointed about the wasted candy, “I suppose you believe that you have earned my trust?” Eridan stares him down hard. “So be it then, I suppose some privileges are in order.” The man shuffles through some folders before he picks one out that identifies Feferi, “Ms. Feferi Peixes. Sea dweller troll of tyrian purple blood and ten sweeps of age. Current occupation is mayor. Subject hides behind an attitude of positivity and life. Subject shows signs of a fragile ego due to harassments of a past lover,” Scratch looks up at Eridan. 

The sea dweller is shocked, “I didn’t-“

“Yes you did. But don’t fret; it’s all part of the plan. You’ll understand that by your over-protection with Ms. Peixes, she is weak for my manipulation.” He puts her file down, “It was always planned that some third party would take office, but because Feferi took the chance I knew that she couldn’t directly take office; instead, I had to give it to her. Imagine, being given everything you want and having to spend so much time trying to change. But now every citizen in Skaia will look at her as another spoiled brat who won what she did not deserve, and she’ll believe the same. Did you not see her face today? She’s lost all the confidence that she had.”

Eridan looks over Feferi’s file, “But why do this at all? Why give her the power when we had it?”

“When I had it you mean,” Scratch corrects. “Isn’t it apparent? Because Feferi is going to be blamed for one of the greatest tragedies in Skaia history, and there’s nothing she can do to stop it or save herself. So then she’ll come running back into your arms crying for you to take her back. It’ll be a dream for you to have the ‘princess’ run back into your arms, and quite easily done. You won’t even have to risk your own reputation simply because there are no risks. We will succeed as long as I continue to live.”

The troll smiles wickedly, “I’m sorry I doubted you Dr. Scratch. You are right as always. Now how are we going to ruin Skaia?”

“With the aid of a special guest who will be here-“ the doorbell rings. “Ah, right on time just as I expected.” Scratch stands up to answer the door while holding a fresh bowl of crustaceans that are still alive squirming in the glass bowl. 

The door opens to reveal a forty-to-fifty years old woman who still looks alluring for her age. The woman has an old fashioned up-do and a red dress and white trimming. Her eyes gloom behind glasses and her dark red lips curl to a grin.

Scratch delicately leads her in, “Mr. Ampora, may I introduce you to the remarkable Mrs. Crocker. She traveled all the way from the Capital.” He turns to her holding up the bowl, “Feel at ease my dear.”

The woman elegantly picks up a squiggling sea creature and inspects it closely, “Ah, wonderful condition as always Doctor.” She then brings the shelled creature close to her mouth and breaks its shell with her mouth and swallows the creature whole. Mrs. Crocker moans in delight as she crushes the poor creatures eyeballs. “Just as I remember them.”

Eridan slowly walks up to the woman with caution clear on his face, “Are you-?”

“Am I what?” She glares down at him.

The troll slowly moves down to a bow, “Empress, it is an honor to be in your presence. Any true follower can immediately recognize their leader.”

“Well,” the woman sneers, “He’s not as stupid as I expected Scratch.”

The White man is busy flipping through the newspaper about the inauguration, “Most beings under my leadership experience similar effects. Do you not recall how you were before with your urban speech and rough exterior?”

The empress in hiding growls, “How’s the Handmaid?”

He shakes his head disappointed, “Still dead. Mrs. Crocker, you know better than to let emotions get in your way. Control yourself.”

“How I wish you would have bent over when I pulled her-“ The woman turns around to notice that the troll is still bowing, “Get up you grub.” Eridan raises himself but continues to stare at the empress. “What now?” she questions annoyed.

“How are you alive? And human?”

The Condescension walks around to pluck another crustacean, “Fool. You should know that your empress cannot be destroyed by some mere nuclear warfare.”

Scratch inspects her body checking for flaws, “And you should be impressed Mr. Ampora how effective makeup and surgery can be.” He turns back to the troll, “And you know the consequences for revealing her.”

“Of course,” Eridan answers breathlessly. “I’ve always dreamt of the empress returning to throne.”

She is not impressed; instead she grabs a nearby newspaper, “Ah my little descendant has her own throne does she?”

Eridan moves to grab the newspaper out of her hand, or something but he is too frightened, “Please empress,” he bows down again, “please don’t cull her! Feferi is innocent and not worthy of your wrath!”

The disguised monster cackles, “What a pathetic creature.” She brings her foot down hard on his hand forcing a cry out of Eridan. “You dare tell me what to do? I used to have the likes of you strung up and dangled in front of my lusus as treats!” 

Dr. Scratch coughs forcibly, “We don’t wish to reinstate your manner lessons do we? Though I did relish stifling your anger; care to try again?” The empress is shaken by those few threats and releases the little troll. Eridan withdraws his hand quickly and murmurs to himself; while Mrs. Crocker turns around holding her hands together out front waiting. “That’s better, and with the ‘aid’ of the Midnight Crew and Mr. SJ’s hoodlums, we can bring forth a nightmare to all of Skaia.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey if you have any questions please address them at the tumblr page: policeforcestuck.tumblr.com !

**Author's Note:**

> For additional content, please check out the PoliceForcestuck tumblr page.


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